The amount of crap I've done and changed in the last couple of days has amazed even me. And it's not that they're bad changes, most of them are both productive and good. But they're still yet more changes. Comcast has gotten zee boot. Or at least, they'll have gotten the boot in another couple of days. I went with AT&T for the phone and for internet, and I killed the cable television entirely. Not like I ever turn the stupid thing on. I cut down services on both cell phones, (Danny you 'tard why on earth didn't you cut the text messaging down if the phone wasn't in use?), and I cut it down on my other one as well. Cut the Netflix account as well, I never have time to watch the movies. It's on hold, actually, in the hope that perhaps within three months I might have time to watch movies again at some point. If I don't have time again then, I'll cancel it outright.
Moved the furniture around. Again. Loaned the LCD television/5-disc changer and small surround sound system to Danny and Mona for a while, as again, I don't really have the time to watch anything, and they needed one for their room at his parent's house. He says I can have it back once he can save up enough to buy one for his room, which is fine, it isn't as though I'm using it right now.
I spent half a damned day on the phone with contractors, service people and Social Security and it's cohorts the other day, setting up various services, and letting people know that I'm working, planning out some things, and lining up assistance. I'm looking into going back to college as well, if I can get it lined up for online courses. School will also take a bit of pressure off me for work if I can get into the right programs with grant money. If everything lines up correctly. If, if, if. So sick of if, and maybe, and possibly.
So tired of jumping through hoops, and government programs, and difficulties. Wish I was normal, and things could be simpler. Wish I could work a normal job, and have a normal life.
Waiting on yet more blood lab results again. May yet have the world fall out from under me if some of that lab work comes back the wrong way, and I'm terrified, honestly about that. Not as terrified as some other people may end up being, but scared just the same.
Evidentally, the things that cause an enlarged liver? Are not things I knew anything about, and I'm not very pleased with what they were testing for, and if those tests come back positive, I'm going to be a lot less pleased yet.
We shall see. Waiting to hear back from the doctor's office now. At least if they come back and I'm sick with some of those things, it isn't going to be *me* calling around and doing the notifying of other parties. I'll be not-so-happily handing over the names and contact information to my doctor, to notify the health department, and they can handle that shit from there.
Danny and I were both completely sexually clean when we were with each other, so if I suddenly test positive for something that's made me sick? It didn't come from me, or from Danny. And with my already compromised immune system, treating me is going to be a massive bitch.
Meh, I got off-track. Back to changes, and all the stuff I've been doing this week. Oh yes, working my ass off, literally as it turns out. Hit the scale, and I'm down seventy one pounds, total, since October third of last year. That's quite a bit. And I'm kind of amused at myself, since I honestly haven't really done anything at all to have lost that, except not be eating anything except what I choose to eat by myself. Nobody to eat *with* anymore, and that seems to be the difference.
Guess that's good for me? But I'm pretty pleased with it. 'Chelle actually just gave me several pairs of jeans that are three sizes smaller, and I needed it, because those are once again bagging on me, and those are the ones that I couldn't get pulled *on* six months ago. I'm happy with my jeans.
I even allow pictures to be taken these days now, without yelling. It's kind of funny.
Okay, as I've got a rotten ass migraine, and I had to take some Imitrex, and I'm fairly stoned right now, I'm going to go and pass out for a couple of hours, and hope it passes so I can still work later tonight, because I need to.
Wish me luck.
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